Public Bathroom Etiquette

Did you know that the toilet seat in a public bathroom is probably cleaner than your toilet at home? Because it is bleached within an inch of its life at least once a day, unlike your filthy ass toilet which you probably clean once a week, AT MOST.  So why tf are you squatting overContinue reading “Public Bathroom Etiquette”

Raw Dogging

Men are such fucking babies about putting a thin piece of latex over that dangly appendage between their legs. “It’s too tiiiiiight,” they’ll whine at you while you’re busy still trying to digest the news about reproductive rights being taken away from women in this year of our Lord.  You’re not that big, shutup. IfContinue reading “Raw Dogging”

Inflation

Who can afford to live well these days on this floating space rock?! In THIS economy? Anyone? Bueller?  Prezzie Biden, Turtle McConnell, Nancy Pelosi, Grandpa Bernie—can y’all please have a meeting of the geriatric minds and find a way to FIX this inflation situation? Y’all can’t keep raising these prices on us without paying usContinue reading “Inflation”

Headshots

There is nothing more excruciating for actors than getting headshots done. I’m sure the model slash actors of the world don’t mind them much but for actors who don’t regularly smolder and smize into a still camera lens we HATE IT. Because there is too much PRESSURE. Our headshots are our calling card, the thingContinue reading “Headshots”

App Dating

This ain’t it, y’all. This aaaaaaaain’t it. Online shopping for people to love like that’s a fucking normal thing to do?! What in the dystopian, Black Mirror, kind of society are we creating?! I know this isn’t, like, some new concept. But if you really stop and think about what we’re doing here, it’s incrediblyContinue reading “App Dating”

Hollywood And Highland

If you don’t live in LA and/or have never visited Hollywood and Highland (H&H) let me describe it for you… It’s the literal seventh ring of tourist hell. You have to duck and dodge through slow moving foreigners and screaming children under the heat of a thousand LA suns while aggressive men try to shoveContinue reading “Hollywood And Highland”

Organized Religion

Church represents two things for me: tradition and guilt.  I went to Catholic mass every Sunday of my life until I moved away from home at eighteen. My family and I were there with bells and whistles on to hear the same stories from the same dusty, outdated book every week, even while dying fromContinue reading “Organized Religion”

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